Perhaps I was remiss some months ago, but I had a change of heart about World of Warcraft.  I do want to wish proper goodbyes, even if very belatedly.

Gaelen: best wishes that your man boobs are as plump and supple as ever.

Skelnik, Trymnam: your little murloc is adorable.  I'm sure he will get his first quest outside of Elwynn soon, and grow up to be a great WoW player someday.  But, seriously--your names came from what was left on your bars after you got bored of a Scrabble game, no?

Mahga: your tanking is awesome.  Frankly, among the best kiting and mob control I have seen.  Your knowledge of the mathematical underpinnings of each mechanic is superlative.  I porked your mom.

Poison: there was this one time, wasn't sure I'd tell you, we were on a hard boss and pulled a bad toss, fire on the floor one healer out the door, took a wrong turn with lots of adds to burn, called out for help but Trymnam was OOM, took a sidestep and your rejuv bloomed, and I JIZZED IN MY PANTS.

Foxy: Get your toon a cocktail dress.  You'll get more tips that way.

Dual: If you are still interested in tanking, when selecting gear, always check the item level, clasp the headpiece as you equip the gear in a downward motion, and make a smooth pull.  After wiping, be sure to refresh the gear and all cooldowns before another attempt.

Fisty: I thought you were Mahga's mom.  For the longest time.  But, I've got it straightened out.  Don't worry.

Gypsies: best of luck as you courageously hunt down Deathwing, and post a pic as you fuck him right up the ass.  Enjoy the next expansion; I'd love to roll a monk but that just sounds really really gay.  I will be developing my molecular dynamics engine and hopefully solo some binary fluid equilibria with my new gear.

Hahaha, I've never seen someone try to get attention as much as you.  Kinda of sad that after so much time has past most people don't even think about you and you have to come back and try to get all drama like.

Yes, perhaps I was a bit hot-headed in some of that.  Briefly, there I was, Saturday after Thanksgiving in a nice food coma, which naturally leads to some reflection.  What has the past year brought?  Where am I going?  So forth.  I wrote as I did for closure.  Honestly, I can't believe I let myself go like that--it's not a matter of hard feelings, just an affirmation that I am glad I no longer play.  Life's far from perfect, but it's much better without being addicted to numbers flying across the screen.  I'm sorry we had so much friction.  I honestly do like to help solve problems and fill others' needs--I know I can be overzealous.  In my comments, I meant a good-spirited roasting, and I'm glad if people can take it that way.  Not "f*ck you," but "f*ck this."

Good night, and good luck.